No Expectations

“I don’t mind what happens.”
Krishnamurti

I experienced an important realization, perhaps a brief moment of Satori Saturday night playing Texas poker (there’s a name to the game…can’t recall it right now- ‘hold ’em’ or something like that). It was only the third time I’ve actually played the game with our group of friends…I’m usually working when they’re playing, so it was a treat to be able to spend some time with my wife and nine friends.

The night ended four hours later with me taking first place ($120 bucks) and beating out some very experienced players. How did I do it? Well, a lot of luck, some skill and the truth be known….I didn’t mind what happened. I wasn’t in the game to win or lose- I just wanted to play, learn to play better and have a good time, so I didn’t "invest" emotionally anything into the game, especially expectations of winning.

Now it certainly wasn’t a stupendous round of poker playing mind you, I barely knew what I was doing especially when it came to counting my chips…but I won, basically by staying with hands that others told me later they would never have kept…because they felt right- and, the cards turned in my favor more times than for the others.

I know this doesn’t mean much in the scheme of things, but I did learn that not minding winning or losing let me play the game without any expectations and that, in itself created a certain amount of freedom in which to play.

How can I use this simple, fun lesson to shed light on certain areas of my life that seem to be invested with so much expectation? What would be the outcome of living as many moments as consciously possible not caring what happens…meaning, not assigning “good” or “bad” to what unfolds? I’m just like most people- I want good in my life, but there comes a point where "good" and "bad" become confusing, easily interchangeable and then eventually fall aside all together into moments of clear being.

Anyway, I’m the “newbie” who has won this week and I’m supposed to play again Friday (defend my title, as they say). I’m really not expecting to win, but it will be fun to play again. It was a “good” lesson for me.