Friday, February 11, 2005

On Being Capable

Presently, I’m in the midst of some human drama surrounding a close friend who is bent on drinking himself to death. While unadulterated by alcohol he is a most capable guy but when he starts drinking he cannot and will not stop until he is falling down- intoxicated. Last week I had to go over to his home and help pull him together and be of support. His girlfriend and me drove him to the doctor’s office for x-rays on his elbow and back, as he was black and blue from falling down and we were afraid he had fractured his elbow and perhaps a rib or two.

What is it that makes a person do this to themselves and to others?

Alcohol is such a powerful drug and alcoholism, such a mysterious disease that I simply refuse to try and understand it. I have experienced first hand the allure and power of alcohol from my years on the road with the band. I am thankful that my body finally revolted shutting down my ability to process alcohol easily and by producing debilitating head-aches when I exceed my limit of one beer or a glass of wine. I am thankful that I had the ability to stop and that my body revolted as it did.

But for others- it’s a mystery to me. I don’t even know the right questions to ask anymore, so I’ve stopped asking. Instead, I choose to simply hold them in a higher consciousness. We can do this with anyone we care about who may be going through a serious illness or disease. We need not fully understand the debilitation or circumstances, rather simply know that they are far more than their sickness and conditions.

We can also choose this higher awareness for ourselves as well. We are more than our limitations; by nature- we are whole and complete, capable of anything we set our minds on. When the body or mind breaks down, our wholeness is still absolute. We are not our brokenness, nor our conditions. We are, by disposition, inseparable from Spirit and there is never anything that we can do to change this.

2 Comments:

Blogger Meredith said...

Dear Tommy,

I feel for you here, trying to support a friend that is struggling so hard. We can never know just what this is like for the other, but we can hold the fact that "they are far more than their sickness and conditions."

What is this brokenness we see? What is this brokenness that we are? Can we offer this up? Our own brokenness is a worthy gift. A friend said, “We can offer our grief and loss, our rage, the incompletion and imperfection of our lives, our hunger, pride and inevitable humiliation, our own self-loathing and secret despair, the dark soil of our human soul.”

We can do this and be reminded that we are more than our limitations; by nature- we are, as you so beautifully note, "whole and complete, capable ..." and "When the body or mind breaks down, our wholeness is still absolute. We are not our brokenness, nor our conditions. We are, by disposition, inseparable from Spirit…”

Thank you for your courage to just be with him, and hold this space for him; in doing this you hold a space for your shared fragility, infused with Grace. Your friend will feel this, on some level, and be lifted by your delicate wings.

12:33 PM  
Blogger Trev Diesel said...

Blessings to your friend. I pray he finds peace, shalom, & wholeness.

12:47 PM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home

Site Meter